IN LOVING MEMORY  OF
KANDA MICHELLE JACOBS

May 24, 1973 - April 13, 2004

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Precious Child
Karen Taylor-Good (On Angel's Wings)
0:00/4:49

 

OUR KANDA MICHELLE

MAY 24, 1973 - APRIL 13, 2004

FOREVER IN OUR HEARTS

 

""PRECIOUS CHILD""

Words and Music by Karen Taylor-Good

(lyrics at end of page)

Graphics/Animations by http://public.fotki.com/juliehollie/

April 13, 2004, our 30 year old daughter drowned while bathing due to a clinical seizure.  Because she had not reported to work or called in, I, her mother, received a call to check on her.  I kept telling myself, since nobody could reach her by phone, there had to b  a mix up and she must have taken a vacation day, but even that thought seemed strange since our entire family works at the same place and she would always let me know if she was not coming into work.

Our daughter, KANDA MICHELLE JACOBS, could see so much beauty on this earth.  Each spring she would start planting flowers and still be planting into late summer.  She had the most beautiful hanging basket of petunias I had ever seen, and her secret was the bumble bee that lived within the flowers.  She told me as long as the bumble bee never bothered her, it could live there all summer and fall.  And the bumble bee stayed and the petunias grew more and more beautiful all summer and into the fall of 2003.  The bee never bothered her and just maybe, I always suspected, the bumble bee knew the home it found was safe.

In the fall, she would purchase an abundance of bulbs for planting and the abundance of bulbs did not even touch the pots and pots of mums she purchased from August through October.  We would go shopping for groceries and she would fill her cart completely with mums in every available color.  Of course, she never had much room for groceries, but the magnificent beauty of the flowers took priority over what she would be eating the next week.  Her yard, house and porch were always decorated for every season of the year with colored lights. My favorite lights were the orange ones she used with the pumpkins, fall colored mums and bunches of dried corn stalks during Halloween and the fall of the year.

During her school years, she was a cheerleader for 6 years and also played a flute in the band through high school.  Her appearance had to be to perfection from bathing, lotioning, curling her hair to pressing her outfit.  She had her schedule down to a science. Her day started at 4:00 AM to manage everything including all the make up, eyelash curling and lip stick to match her pressed and creased clothing.  Lastly , was the chosen perfume of the day and I always woke up without my alarm once the perfume was applied.

She had a love for animals like I had never seen before.   She bought medicine for any sick or injured animal in the neighborhood and would try to nurse them back to health.  She had two house cats, numerous outside cats and a gorgeous pure white Springer Spaniel.  She would stop along the highway to move a turtle from the road to safety.  All animals were so special to her and she could not stand to watch an animal suffer.  She would worry over an injured animal and try to relieve any suffering as she did for the cat  that had walked on hot tar poured in a drive way.  She bought antibiotics and cream from the vet for the cat.  But to her disappointment, once the cat knew she was going to pump antibiotics down it's throat, the cat did not come near her for a long time.

Kanda was married in 1995 and after having two miscarriages, she went through a divorce so she had lived alone since 1998. Our hometown of Flora, Illinois has a population of 5500 so I never had any cause to worry about her.  After all, she only lived five minutes from work.  What could possibly happen to her.  She was safe. So, I THOUGHT.  She lived in a small neat cottage style home and not only did she have considerate and kind neighbors, she also had many animal neighbors since most every family on her street  had dogs and cats.  But the beauty of all the animals, seasonal decorations and flowers on the outside came together perfectly with the inside of her cozy home.  She collected Coca Cola products so she had a Coca Cola utility room, kitchen, dining room and bathroom.  After going to many fabric stores, I put the final touches in her Coca Cola rooms by making all the Coca Cola curtains.

I found our beautiful Kanda on April 13, 2004 in a flooded bathroom floating face down on top of the water.  The water had been running for hours and was ice cold. I propped her head up on a towel, shut off the water and pulled the plug.  I immediately called 911 and it took the operator many  times to understand the address  I kept screaming at her. I sat on the edge of the tub and held my daughter's head rubbing her ice cold face begging for a miracle which, of course, I knew deep down was not going to happen.  My husband, Jack, arrived after the EMTs had

After the ambulance left, the city police locked her house down so they could investigate the cause of her death.  It was later ruled accidental due to a seizure. To our knowledge, she had only one other seizure in 2002 and our family doctor thought it had been brought on from stress of working too much overtime.
 
Our lives are forever changed.  Her brother has two children, Aaron age 7 and Ashley age 3.   Ashley looks so much like Kanda and we are so blessed to have our son and grandchildren living so near.  They keep us alive and the spirit of Kanda alive for all of our family.

Since I, alone, found my daughter, this nightmare will always be with me.  She would have been 31 years old on May 24, 2004. Some days I feel cheated but I think about all the beauty she could see on this earth and I know within my heart she was able to grasp all the world had to offer during her 31 year journey here. What a gift she had.  

Our entire family misses her funny wit and bluntness as she always had a quick answer for everything,  but we also feel so blessed to have had almost 31 years with her.  She was not only my daughter, but also my best friend.  She always found time in her busy life for me and her family.

ADDENDUM

We, the family of Kanda Michelle Jacobs, were very ignorant as to the seriousness of seizures.  Kanda could not admit what she suspected might be going on concerning seizure activity,  even as she feared it may be increasing as she became more stressed from demanding job responsibilities and many hours of overtime.  Kanda was in denial as to what was happening to her body even though she suspected she might be having seizures in her sleep when she would routinely wake up feeling very sore and achy for no other apparent reason.  Even then she did not seek medical attention,  as she was fearful of losing her driving privileges and her job which allowed her to live alone and support herself.
 
Kanda did not have to die.  With the correct diagnosis and prescribed medication, she could have lived a normal life, retained her drivers license, and most important of all, she could have maintained her work ethics and stayed self supportive.  

Since Kanda's death,  we have learned of the many dangers related to seizure activity,  and number one on the list is water. No one close to Kanda had ever given thought to the danger of something as simple as bathing.  As her family, we are saddened by the fact  that the seizure itself was not the cause of Kanda's  death, but the seizure caused her to drown when she passed out while bathing with the water still running.  Prior to this horrible day, Kanda had passed out completely due to a seizure in the spring of 2002 and to our knowledge and to hers, that particular seizure was the first.  We now know she had many in her sleep after this initial occurrence.  

We do know that on April 13th, sometime after 12:00 PM , Kanda had exercised at Curves and had eaten a salad from Subway as the container for the salad was still sitting on her kitchen table.  Her curling iron was plugged in and her clothes that she planned to wear to her second shift job were laid out and ready.  Knowing these facts tells us she was evidently feeling fine as she prepared to go to work that afternoon.  

We have added this addendum to the original story in hopes that this information may help others suffering from seizure activity.  Any type of seizure activity is serious.  Maybe this warning will give someone a second chance, the second chance that our 30 year old

KANDA MICHELLE

did not get.    




 




PRECIOUS CHILD

Words and Music by Karen Taylor-Good

In my dreams, you are alive and well
Precious child, precious child
In my mind, I see you clear as a bell
Precious child, precious child

In my soul, there is a hole
That can never be filled
But in my heart, there is hope
'Cause you are with me still

In my heart, you live on
Always there never gone
Precious child, you left too soon
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart

In my plans, I was the first to leave
Precious child, precious child
But in this world, I was left here to grieve
Precious child, my precious child

In my soul, there is a hole
That can never be filled
But in my heart there is hope
And you are with me still

In my heart you live on
Always there, never gone
Precious child, you left too soon,
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart

God knows I want to hold you,
See you, touch you
And maybe there's a heaven
And someday I will again
Please know you are not forgotten until then

In my heart you live on
Always there never gone
Precious child, you left too soon
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart

Background Music - "Precious Child" - Karen Taylor-Good

The melody "Precious Child" was written and performed by Karen Taylor-Good in loving memory of her nephew, Paul Rodgers. First sung at the 1998 TCF National Conference in Nashville, this moving song is now available on CD or Cassette Tape from the TCF Resource Center. Perfect for memorial services, Side 1 of the Cassette Tape features Karen’s stirring vocals, while Side 2 is an instrumental version of the song. A lyric sheet is provided with each tape so that you can sing along.

Permission granted by Karen-Taylor Good to be used on Memorial websites

Thank You, Karen

Desi & Dianna ©